Realizing things won't be completely perfect, no matter how hard I try
Sometimes I get discouraged. When I look back at who I used to be, I know I am not the same. I know I will never be the same. My anxiety will get the best of me every now and again. I will have flashbacks when I feel threatened by a man. I will be overly observant when I am out and about. I will be less forgiving, and I won’t trust anyone right off the bat. I struggle to find the ‘good’ in people when all I see is ‘bad’. When someone betrays me, I almost can’t get over it. Every effort to trust or forgive someone that hurts me now is almost impossible. Sometimes, I can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel. I used to be so much more positive, naturally happier, so much more loving. That person is gone. If I want to keep my sanity, I have to try to always stay positive. I have to push out my anxiety-prone thoughts. I have to make such a great effort to be happy, and see the good in people and myself. I get pissed so easily now it’s like the flip of a switch. I have to control th